


(Now You're Just) Somebody That I Used To Know

by AverageMarvelBitch



Series: Stony Shorts [6]
Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Amnesia AU, F/M, M/M, Post-Infinity War, au where thanos was defeated and everyone was happy, mentions of Bucky Barnes/Natasha Romanov - Freeform, mentions of Thor/Bruce Banner, until the author decided it was time for angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-05
Updated: 2019-04-28
Packaged: 2020-01-05 07:22:24
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 8,143
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18361316
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AverageMarvelBitch/pseuds/AverageMarvelBitch
Summary: Thanks to Loki, Steve remembers everything and everyone, except for Tony.Tony tries to deal with it until Strange comes back and fixes his partner so they can be together again. And he has to believe that whatever happened with Steve can be fixed, because he doesn't know what he'd do if he lost the man he loves forever.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> If you like it, leave kudos and a comment (; 
> 
> https://averagemarvelbitch.tumblr.com

“What do you mean he doesn’t remember?”

Both doctors looked at each other, apparently not knowing exactly what to say.

“Well, Mr. Stark… The captain seems to be fine, there are no injuries, no concussion, nothing that could possibly explain this sudden… forgetfulness”.

“That’s understandable”, Natasha said, crossing her arms, “Loki was the one who did it so it’s safe to assume he used magic”, she turns to Tony, her voice turning soft, “We should consult with Strange, maybe he can help”.

“Yes, sure, but I don’t understand. He remembers everything and everyone, except for me?”

“Loki did say he wanted to hurt you, man”, Clint shrugged, “so it makes sense”.

“No, none of this makes any sense”, Tony replied, gripping his own hair so hard Natasha thought he might rip it off, “That goddamn freak of nature, I’m gonna kill him next time I see him”.

He huffed and took out his phone, turning to leave the waiting area.

“Where are you going?”, Natasha asked, worried.

“To call Strange. I’m sure he can _bibbidi-bobbidi-boo_ Steve back to normal in a second, right?”

* * *

“There’s nothing I can do”, Dr. Strange said, turning his head to look at the Avengers, who were all standing inside Steve’s room, clearly going against the hospital’s visiting rules.

“What the hell are you talking about? You’re a wizard! This is a simple amnesia case, it’s not like we’re asking you to kill freaking Voldemort here”.

“Who is this Voldemort the man of Iron talks about?” Thor whispered to Clint, who snickered.

“Evil wizard who wants to kill everyone who doesn’t have magic”.

“Outrageous. We shall defeat this villain at once”.

Tony shook his head, trying to keep himself calm.

“There has to be something you can do”.

“I’m sorry. There isn’t. Your memories are still there, Captain”, Strange said, turning back to Steve, “but there is a powerful spell preventing you from accessing them. I do not have the means to break this spell right now, but I will do some research with Wong. I’m sure we will find something soon”.

Steve nodded, looking very confused.

“It’s fine, take as much time as you need, Doctor. It’s not like I forgot too much, I mean, I just forgot one person, right?” he said, trying to be positive.

He looked at his friends and their reactions told him he had just said something really _really_ bad. Tony, in particular, looked like someone had stabbed him in the stomach. He excused himself and quickly left the room.

“I said something stupid, didn’t I?”

“Yeah, man. Yeah, you really did”.

* * *

They found Tony sitting in the waiting area, hands on his head, crying softly. Wanda was sitting beside him. She looked up when she noticed the others approaching and threw them a very sad look, pursing her lips.

“Tony”, Natasha said, kneeling down in front of her teammate, “you know he didn’t really mean it like that, right?”

“Yeah”, he whispered his reply, “yeah, I know. It was just too much for me”.

“We understand”, Wanda said with a heavy accent that always showed itself up again when she was tired or upset, “but we will fix this. I offered to go with Dr. Strange, to help with the research. Vision is already there with him. We will find a solution”.

“In the meantime, we’ll just tell him all about you, ok?”

“No”.

The Avengers looked at each other, confused.

“No?”

“No. We’re not going to tell him”.

“Why the ever loving fuck not?” Clint demanded.

“Because if we tell him, he’ll feel obligated to be with me”, Tony explained in an angry tone, “You know how he is. He’ll think that because we were together before this happened, he’s obligated now to be my… partner. I don’t want that. He doesn’t know me, I’m a complete stranger. We’ll tell him the basics and that’s it”.

There was a moment of silence. Clint clearly wanted to say something, but stopped himself when Bruce put a hand on his arm, shaking his head.

“Alright, Tony”, Natasha finally said, holding her friend’s hand, “We’ll do it your way. But if he asks a direct question, then we’re not going to lie, ok?”

“Yeah. That’s fair”.

Tony took a deep breath, trying to calm himself. He felt Natasha’s arms surrounding him in a hug and let himself go, crying and returning the hug, not really caring if the others were watching.

* * *

Bucky, who had stayed with Steve during the conversation, had been filled in on the plan after the blond had finally gone to sleep. He didn’t much care for it, especially because he knew how good Tony and Steve were together and how much this was hurting Tony, but, when Natasha explained Tony’s reasons he couldn’t help but understand where the older man was coming from.  The couple had gone through so much in the past years, they had worked so hard to forgive each other’s mistakes and move on. And now, when things were finally going so well for them, after two years of being a disgustingly cute couple, they were separated again. Fate really was a bitch.

The hospital didn’t keep Steve for much longer. He stayed one more night in “observation” and left the next morning. The former Captain of the Howling Commandos was very happy to be returning home and acted as if nothing had happened. It bothered Bucky that his best friend seemed completely unaffected by the terrible situation they were in, but he tried to reason with himself. Steve had no reason to feel bad about it. He remembered his entire life. Everything and everyone, except for Tony. How could he miss something he didn’t remember? And why would he suffer over such a tiny detail that made no difference in his life? _It did make a difference, though_ , Bucky thought, shaking his head as he walked his best friend inside his apartment.

Steve hadn’t lived here in quite a while, a year to be exact, but for some reason Bucky couldn’t fathom the place looked well lived in. There were portraits everywhere ― Steve and Bucky at the METs game; Natasha, Steve and Sam playing videogames; Steve and Thor singing karaoke ―, not to mention the plates drying beside the sink and the pillows on the floor in the middle of the leaving room.

“What the hell…”, Bucky whispered to himself, looking around.

“Home sweet home!”

“Yeah, yeah”, he replied absently and then stopped, looking over at Steve with a raised eyebrow, “So, what’s the last thing you remember about this place? As in, the last time you were here?”

Steve frowned, thinking. “Last thing I remember is making breakfast and eating it before leaving for a run. I made pancakes”.

 _Well, he’s not wrong_ , Bucky thought. He really had made breakfast. Then he and Tony had very gross and unhygienic sex against the kitchen top, according to a very happy Steve, who should learn how to do his morning runs with his mouth shut because Bucky and Sam _really_ didn’t want to know about his sex life, thank you very much.

“I’m kind of hungry. How about some pasta?” Steve asked, already taking out a pot from the cupboard.

“Yeah, sure, pasta sounds good”, Bucky replied, sitting down on the kitchen aisle and watching his best friend cook, smiling as if nothing was wrong, completely unaware that he had lost the love of his life for the second time.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tony and the team try to make Steve remember.

A week had passed with no changes. Steve still didn’t remember Tony and didn’t seemed bother in the slightest by it, which only made the billionaire feel worse about the whole thing. Tony wasn’t giving up, though. Even though he remained adamant about the whole “we don’t tell Steve the truth” plan, he still tried to make him remember by doing small, simple things that could maybe spark some memories.

On the first few days, he tried to be around Steve as much as possible. He would wake up extra early and “accidently” run into him before his morning run and try to start a conversation about, well, anything really. The weather, the food they had the day before, or what kind of movie they could pick for movie night. Every single time, though, Steve would be cold and brief, leaving a very sad, very frustrated Tony behind.

Soon after that, Tony decided to change tactics. He told the rest of the team they should start having lunch and dinner together, so Steve and he could have some time with each other without it being weird. Everyone promptly agreed and so, for two weeks, the team had every meal of the day together on the communal floor. Unfortunately, that did not have the desirable outcome. After a week, Steve started to show less and less for meals, saying he had to go to SHIELD or that he had plans with someone else. Feeling defeated, Tony called it off and stopped coming to meals altogether.

The team, however, didn’t give up. They invited Steve out for various activities, like going to the movies, or grabbing something to eat, or jogging through Central Park, etc., and talked about Tony.

_Did you know Tony created the original Iron Man suit from scratch inside a cave in the middle of the desert? Yes, Clint, I read his file._

_You know, Tony saved us all by taking a nuke into space, even though that would most certainly kill him? Yes, Bruce, I’m aware. I was there._

_Tony and I were watching Psycho last night. You two used to watch a lot of Hitchcock movies, you know. Maybe you should try watching one with him sometime. Yeah, maybe, we’ll see, Nat._

_You considered the Man of Iron your best friend before Loki’s treachery took away your memories of it. You were very close. That’s nice to know, Thor, thanks._

They tried everything. Still, Steve wouldn’t budge. Every time someone as much as mentioned Tony, he would grow quiet, defensive, and would change the subject as soon as possible. It was very frustrating, but they refused to give up. Tony and Steve deserved to be together, they belong to each other, and the team would fight to their last breath to unite the two soulmates again.

* * *

It was movie night and Tony wasn’t feeling up to it. He was in his workshop, messing around with a _perfectly fine and functional suit, boss, it needs no tinkering whatsoever,_ and ignoring FRIDAY’s pleas for him to go meet his teammates in the communal floor.

“What are you still doing here, Tony? I said movie night started at seven sharp”.

Tony didn’t turn, nor did he acknowledge Natasha’s presence in any way, keeping his eyes focused on the suit in front of him. Natasha sighed.

“I know this is hard for you. I understand”.

“Do you? Do you understand what I’m feeling right now?” Tony replied, angry.

Natasha raised an eyebrow, crossing her arms. “Do I understand what it’s like to look the man you have always loved in the eyes and see no recognition on them? Do I know what is like to be around the man you love and not be able to touch him or kiss him or hug him because he doesn’t remember who you are or what you meant to each other? Yes, Tony, I think I know a little about that”.

Tony took a deep breath and closed his eyes, ashamed. Of course Nat knew all about that. She had spent years waiting, hoping that one day James’ memories of her would come back. And she suffered in silence, never letting anyone know what exactly the Winter Soldier meant to her.

“I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have said that”.

“No, you shouldn’t. But I understand how terrible you feel right now. And I’ll forgive you if you come with me”.

“Yeah. Yeah, okay”, he replied, getting up and shutting the holograms down.

They took the elevator up, both completely silent, not really knowing what to say to each other. When they arrived on the communal floor, Nat went straight to the couch, sitting beside Bucky, and Tony went to the kitchen. He was getting close to the door and could hear the voices inside.

“Nat went to the workshop to get Tony”, he heard Clint say, probably answering someone’s question. Tony was about to open the door when he heard a sigh.

“Do we have to invite Stark?”

The question made Tony stop immediately, hand still on the handle. He recognized the voice. It was Steve.

“What do you mean, _do we have to invite Stark_?” Clint asked in a mocking voice, “dude, of course we have to invite Tony, he’s our friend”.

“Yeah, but he’s just… So noisy and so needy. He talks all the time during the movies, it’s annoying”.

_Annoying_ , Tony thought to himself. He didn’t understand. Steve always loved when he talked during the movies, he said it was endearing and the commentary ― mostly Tony pointing out the scientific mistakes ― always made the movie more fun. Had Steve been lying before? Telling Tony what he wanted to hear but, in reality, hating it? He blinked and shook his head, trying to concentrate once more in the conversation inside.

“I know, but, honestly? He’s always around. He’s at every meal talking all the time. He’s at the door every time I try to go running in the morning. He is here on movie nights just bothering everyone with his incessant talking. He’s annoying. I just wish I didn’t have to see so much of him, you know”.

Tony didn’t hear Clint’s reply. He felt like his heart had just shattered into a thousand pieces. It felt just like when Obadiah tore away his arc reactor, only so much worse. So much worse than the torture in the desert, so much worse than Thanos sticking a piece of his own armor through his stomach. The pain was almost unbearable. He took a step back, looking at the floor but not actually seeing anything, his eyes losing focus. He didn’t even notice when Clint opened the door.

“Tony?”

He raised his head and looked blankly at the archer. “Hey”.

“Great, you’re here, let’s start movie night, huh?” Clint asked, apprehensive.

“No, yeah, I can’t. I have… a project. Important. Need to… to finish it. Yeah, so…”

He turned and walked as fast as he could to the elevator. He heard Clint and Natasha calling for him, but he ignored them. As soon as he got inside the elevator, FRIDAY ― thank God for his beautiful, amazing AI ―  closed the doors. But not before he saw Steve’s face, full of regret.

* * *

 As soon as he stepped inside his workshop, Tony asked FRIDAY to put the whole place on lockdown. He wanted to cry. He wanted to scream. He wanted to break things. He wanted Steve back. The billionaire didn’t have time to act on his impulses, however. He heard the faint sound of the sling-ring being formed before he even saw it. He turned to watch as Dr. Strange came out, looking very upset. _Bad news, then_.

“Tony, I… Is this a bad time?” Strange asked, seeming concerned.

“No, it’s fine. What is it? Did you find something?”

“I’m afraid the spell put on Captain Rogers is a bit more complex than what I’m used to. I believe only Loki would be able to return the Captain to his former self”.

Tony nodded absently, not looking at Strange. ”So, we need to find Loki, then”.

“I have told Thor already. We will search all realms for him. We will find him, Tony, and he will put a stop on his spell”.

“Yeah, okay. Good luck”.

Strange sent him a pitying look before nodding his head and leaving through his sling-ring.

Tony felt himself fall to the floor, slowly, back against the working bench. He knew he was crying because he could feel the tears sliding down his face. He felt nothing. It was like the pain was so severe his mind decided to turn itself off. He hugged his legs, pulling them closer to his chest, and let himself go. He had been so stupid to think he could have this. That he could ever deserve someone like Steve. Fate had once again showed that the monster Tony Stark was not good enough to have a happy ending. He didn’t deserve one.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Steve is moving on, Tony is giving up, and Bucky is not having this shit.

Tony spent the next week hiding in his workshop, avoiding not only Steve but also everybody else. He just couldn’t bring himself to face them. He knew that, by now, either Clint or Steve would’ve told the others about what had happened in the kitchen that day and, honestly, he didn’t think he would be able to handle their looks full of pity for him. He just wouldn’t. So he stayed at his workshop, asked FRIDAY to tell everyone he was fine and just needed some time for himself, and successfully avoided any and all contact with the rest of the Avengers.

In his self imposed isolation, Tony went through all the possible outcomes for the Loki incident, as he was calling it inside his head. Best case scenario, Steve would get his memories back and they would resume their relationship. Worst case scenario, his partner would never remember their relationship and Tony would spend the rest of his life alone. And then there were the other options: maybe Steve would remember him but realize he didn’t actually love Tony, so he would leave him; or Steve would never get his memories back, would find out about his previous relationship with Tony and fall in love with him again ( _un-fucking-likely,_ he thought to himself); or maybe Steve would find out about the relationship and be disgusted by it and never want to see Tony again. So many possibilities, it was honestly driving him crazy.

He finally left the workshop almost two weeks after the kitchen incident. He pretended nothing had ever happened, waved Steve’s apology as if everything was alright and refused every invitation to spend time with the team, especially when Steve was there. He mostly kept to himself and waited for Dr. Strange and Thor to come back with that _asshole_ Loki so he could undo whatever it was that he had done to the Captain.

But two weeks turned into three, three turned into four and suddenly, Tony was very much aware that almost three months had passed without any news about Loki or changes in Steve. Every day that passed, the engineer felt more depressed and even more certain that his love would never remember him. Telling Steve wasn’t a choice, especially now he knew he pretty much hated Tony. So, he decided that maybe, just maybe, it was time to move on. And that very morning, he found out that Steve, albeit unknowingly, had decided to do the exact same thing.

* * *

He was in the communal kitchen, a place he had avoided plenty these past few months, when Steve arrived, looking a bit sheepish.

“Hey, Stark. Good morning”.

The _Stark_ and the lack of warmth in his greeting still hurt Tony, but he forced a smile and tried to ignore it.

“Morning, Cap”, he replied and turned back to his coffee machine, falling silent again.

Neither of them talked as they made themselves breakfast, although Steve would sometimes glance at Tony. He finally broke the silence after a long sigh.

“So, doing anything swell in that workshop of yours?” Steve asked and then frowned, as if he was a bit horrified with what had just come out of his mouth.

Tony threw him a small smile, “Nothing all that interesting. What about you, Cap, what have you been up to?”

“Oh, I had a date this week”.

Tony stopped for a second, coffee mug still in hand, trying to process what he had just heard. He felt as if he’s insides were slowly freezing, his body going cold and numb.

“That’s… nice”, he said, pouring himself some coffee and trying to be as quick as possible because it was one thing to accept that Steve would never want him again and that he would, soon, move on, and another completely different to actually hear the love of his life talking about being with someone else.

“Yeah, but… I don’t know, I’m not very good at it”, Steve replied, sounding a bit sad, “I don’t think I’m going to call her again. It’s just… She’s probably going to say no, anyway, so…”

Tony was so ready to leave. His brain kept screaming _run run run_ at him, but the rest of his body wouldn’t move. He looked down at his coffee and made a nonchalant sound, trying so very hard to not show his heartbreak.

“Do you really like her?” his mouth moved and the words that came out of it surprised Tony, who didn’t even notice he talked until he heard his own voice reaching his ears.

“Yeah. Her name’s Bonnie, she’s a real swell girl. We went to this little Italian restaurant down the block…”

“Piccolo Ristorante”, Tony supplied.

“Yeah, that’s the one. Real nice place, they have these…”

“Amazing cannolis, yeah, I know”.

Steve frowned, looking confused. “Oh, you’ve been there?”

And all Tony wanted to do was scream. _Yes, Steve, I’ve been there. I’ve been there with you a thousand times. I took you there for our first date, years ago, and you ate 35 cannolis because you’re the biggest sweet tooth I’ve ever met in my entire life and you just took someone else to OUR special place and it feels like I can’t breathe._ “Yeah, I… I’ve been there”.

“Oh. So, yeah, I… I do like Bonnie, a lot. But, hey, the serum fixed a lot of things, but my awkwardness in dates was not one of them”, he said, smiling sadly.

And at this very moment, Tony knew. This was it. It was over. Maybe it should have never happened in the first place. So many times they had tried to be together and then something would come and ruin it. SHIELD falling, the accords, Siberia, Thanos. Maybe the universe was trying to tell them something, show them that it was better this way, that they weren’t meant to be together, that their story would never have a happy ending so they better just stop now and move on. When the realization finally hit him, Tony didn’t cry. In fact, he felt nothing. No sadness, no pain. His whole body was numb, his mind empty. He merely held his coffee mug, the only source of warmth he had at that moment, and looked at Steve.

“You should call her. Worst that could happen is she says no, but I doubt she will. She’d be crazy to say no to you, Steve. You’re good looking, you’re kind, you’re funny. And, more than anything, you deserve to be happy. You own it to yourself to at least try”.

The words felt like ash in his mouth, but he didn’t let it show. Steve looked at him for a moment, thoughtful, before smiling and nodding.

“Thanks, Tony, I needed to hear that. You know what, I’m going to call her right now. Thanks a lot!”

And with that, Steve shoved the last piece of waffle in his mouth while putting his plate inside the dishwasher and left with a final wave.

Tony stood there for a moment, staring at the closed elevator. He felt a hand on his shoulder and jumped a bit, turning.

“What the hell did you just do, man?”, Bucky asked, shaking his head.

Tony smiled, “It’s fine. Some things just aren’t meant to be. It’s better this way, terminator”, he turned to leave, but seemed to remember something, turning back to Bucky while pulling on a chain around his neck.

Bucky knew immediately what it was. “No, no, Tony, come on”.

“It’s fine. Here”. It was only when he pulled the chain with Steve’s dog tags over his head that the soldier finally noticed something different in it. A ring, a simple golden band shining amidst the silver. Bucky took them for Tony, feeling his hand shake a little as he stared at it.

“Steve proposed the day before”, the engineer said, taking a deep breath, “I said yes, but now… Well, it seems silly to hold onto it. I’m sure he will find someone else to give it to”.

“He… Tony, why the fuck didn’t you tell anyone?”

Tony shrugged. “I thought it would be better that way. Anyway, could you give him back the dog tags?”, unable to stand there any longer without completely breaking down, Tony took a deep breath and started walking towards the elevator, “Thanks, terminator, I own you one”.

Bucky watched the elevator doors close and, when they finally did, looked down at the chain in his hand, completely lost. He caught some words on the inside of the ring and raised it closer to his face, reading it.

_Through it all, together_.

He could hear Stevie’s voice saying them. He could see Tony’s smile hearing them. He could see them, together, happy.

After everything they had been through… SHIELD falling, the accords, Siberia, the fucking purple asshole… Everything that had happened and yet the universe had thrown them together again and again and again. They were meant to be together. And Goddamn it they were going to be together because Bucky was NOT about to just accept this shit.

With a determined look, Bucky went straight for the stairs. “FRIDAY, get the others. I’m done with this”.

“Right away, Sergeant Barnes”,  the AI happily replied.

They had some fucking planning to do.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Originally, I planned for three chapters, but I couldn't finish on this one. I have two endings in mind, a happy one and a sad one. So, which one would you guys prefer? The sad one? The happy one? Both? Let me know in the comments!


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Avengers come up with a plan.

**FOUR**

 

They all met at Natasha’s floor as soon as Bucky made the call. Thor was out there somewhere with Dr. Strange, most likely looking for a way to revert Loki’s spell, but Vision and Wanda were back, which was good. They would need all the help they could get.

When he finally arrived, he saw Clint and Natasha sitting on the sofa, Vision and Wanda on the ground, talking in whispers, and Bruce just standing behind the couch, walking from one end to the other, a thoughtful expression on his face. Nat was the first one to spot the Winter Soldier and nodded at him.

“So, what made you change your mind?”

Bucky, now having everyone’s undivided attention, showed them the chain with the dog tags and the ring.

“Shut your fucking mouth, is that a ring?”

“Yeah. Apparently, Steve proposed the day before Loki came and fucked everything up”.

“Those two can never get a break, can they?” Wanda asked out loud, looking very upset.

“Well, they have us. So we’re going to fix this for them”, Bucky replied, putting the chain in his pocket, “But first, we need to come up with a plan”.

“Why don’t we just tell Steve about Tony?”

“We can’t”, Bruce promptly answered, “If we do that and they get together and Tony finds out… It will be much worse”.

“You know, I find it very strange that Steve hasn’t tried anything with Tony”.

“What do you mean?”

“Well”, Wanda started, thoughtful, “He may not have the memories of Tony, but he should still be attracted to him, shouldn’t he? Attraction has nothing to do with whether he remembers Tony or not”.

“That’s… Actually a very good point. Was Steve attracted to Tony from the beginning?”

“Yes, I can confirm that”, Nat said with a smirk, “They didn’t hit it off right away, but Steve once told me that even when they were fighting in the helicarrier, he couldn’t stop thinking about how handsome Tony was”.

“Exactly. So why isn’t he attracted to Tony now?”

“Perhaps the spell did not merely erase the Captain’s memories, but did something else as well? Maybe it blocked something inside the Captain’s mind, making him incapable of falling in love with Mr. Stark again”.

“That actually makes a lot of sense, Vision”.

Clint snorted. “Okay, but that complicates things, right? How are we going to make Steve fall in love with Tony if there’s something blocking it or whatever?”

“We make him jealous”, Natasha supplied with a smile.

“YES”, Bucky shouted, laughing, “yeah, that’s it. So simple, how didn’t I think of that?”

“You think making him jealous is going to break the spell?”

“I think it’s an option”.

“No, but it’s perfect. Steve is very possessive. When he was sweet on Peggy Carter, he heard Howard mention _fondue_ , jumped to conclusions and spent the entire walk back to base fuming that Peggy deserved better, that Howard wouldn’t treat a dame like her right, and blah blah blah”, Bucky said, rolling his eyes, “I’m telling you, that walk back was the worst thing that ever happened to me”.

“Weren’t you tortured, brainwashed and frozen like a very bad ice cream?”

“I said what I said, Barton”.

“So, we make Steve jealous. That’s the plan. Okay. How do we do that, though?”

“Simple”, Bucky smiled, “We throw a party”.

* * *

“A party?”

“Yes, Tony, a party. Come on, it’s been three years since we beat that giant purple asshole and we should celebrate it. We survived! We saved the world! Let’s party”.

Tony took a deep breath, turning from his computer to finally face Clint Barton.

“I don’t know. I don’t much feel like throwing a party, Katniss”.

“We’ll take care of everything. Just show up, would you? It’ll be good, man, a good distraction from all this crap”.

Tony _really_ wasn’t in the mood for a party. And he knew that, if they threw one, Steve would probably want to bring his new girlfriend and Tony really really _really_ couldn’t handle that right now. But Clint was looking at him with those eyes, just waiting for an answer, acting as if this party was the most important thing in the world for him.

He sighed. “Okay, Clint, yeah, a party”.

“YES! You’re not gonna regret this, Tones”.

_I already do, Katniss_ , Tony thought, shaking his head as Clint left the workshop, _I already do_.

* * *

“A party? That actually sounds pretty nice”.

“Right? So, you like the idea, let’s have a party?”

“Sure, yeah, sounds fun”, Steve replied, entering his apartment, Bucky right behind him.

“So, here’s the thing, we’re only inviting the people who fought Thanos that day, so no outsiders”.

“Oh, you mean Bonnie? Yeah, don’t worry, I gave up”.

“Really?” Bucky asked, surprised, as he sat down in one of the chairs in the kitchen, “Why?”

“You’re gonna think I’m crazy”.

Bucky laughed. “Stevie, you jump out of planes without a parachutes and used to pick fights with people ten times your size. I’ve always thought you were crazy, man”.

Steve smiled, shaking his head. “I guess”.

“So, tell me, why did you give up?”

Steve pressed his lips into a thin line, looking anywhere but at Bucky. “I felt… Weird”.

“Weird?”

“It’s… Hard to explain. When we were on the date, it was like my brain kept going _yeah, this is fun, she’s beautiful_ and then all of a sudden I’d get this really horrible feeling like I was doing something really really wrong. Like I was…”

“Like you were what?”

“I don’t know. Cheating”.

Steve raised his head to look at Bucky, frowning when he saw the huge smile in his friend’s face.

“Well, I’m glad my troubles amuse you”.

“Sorry, sorry, it’s just… She wasn’t right for you, you know. But hey, maybe you’ll meet someone at the party, huh? Try dancing a little with some people and who knows, maybe you’ll find that the right partner was right in front of you all along”.

Steve stared at his best friend with a weird look on his face. “No offense, Buck, but you’re not my type”.

Bucky shook his head, laughing. “Punk”.

“Jerk”, Steve replied with a smile.

* * *

 

Even though he very much wished to be anywhere but there, Tony had to admit that Natasha really could throw one hell of a party. The engineer walked around the room, smiling at everyone he encountered, trying so very hard to show everyone he was fine. Overall, he was doing a great job. He had pointedly avoided Steve ever since he had arrived and intended to continue to do so for the entire party. He knew he had to face his partner ― _former_ partner ― sometime, but right now the wound was still bleeding. He needed time. He would get over Steve, of course he would, but not now. Not right now. He was distracted by his thoughts that he yelped in surprise when he felt a hand on his waist, pulling in into a strong chest.

“Thor! What are you doing?”

“I would like a dance, Man of Iron. As you know, since my Jane left me, I have not had the pleasure of dancing with anyone. I very much enjoy this activity and know you enjoy it as well”.

“Maybe you should ask someone else, big guy. I’m not very good company right now”.

“Nonsense! It is always an honor to be in your company, son of Stark, and I would be honored if you gave me the pleasure of this dance”.

Tony smiled, nodding. “Yeah, yeah, okay. Thanks, thunder thighs”.

Suddenly, “The Way You Look Tonight” came on and Tony felt like crying. He took a deep breath and swallowed the tears that threatened to fall while Thor swayed him from one side to the other.

“Something  wrong?”

“No, just… This song reminds me of something I’m trying very hard not to think about right now”.

“I see”, and with that, Thor hugged the smaller man, pulling him even closer as they danced, “I am not good with words of comfort, my friend, but I have been told sometimes an embrace from a loving friend should be enough”.

Tony smiled, raising his chin to look at Thor. “Yeah. Yeah, it is. Thank you, Thor”.

* * *

“Steve? Are you even listening?”

“What?” the blonde almost shouted, seeming very angry.

“Wow, relax, man”.

“Sorry, sorry. I don’t know what came over me, I…” he turned his eyes back at the couple on the dance floor once more, “Are Thor and Tony together?”

Clint feigned ignorance. “I don’t know. But, I mean, I don’t blame Thor for trying, you know. Tony is a very handsome guy”.

“Yeah, I guess”, Steve said, closing his eyes and touching his forehead, frowning as if he was in pain.

This time, Clint actually seemed concerned. “Hey, everything alright?”

“Yeah. I’m going to get myself another drink. I’ll be right back”, he replied, leaving before Clint could say anything else, but not before throwing another glance at Tony and Thor.

* * *

Tony should have noticed something weird was going on when, right after the dance with Thor, T’Challa approached him with a plate in his hands, looking far better than anyone had a right to, in Tony’s opinion.

“Ah, Tony, it’s very good to see you”.

“You too, T’Challa. How’s Wakanda?”

“It prospers, as it always has. Here, I brought you a piece of cake”.

Tony took one look at the cake and wrinkled his nose. Lemon. He wasn’t much of a fan, but he figured that if the king of Wakanda had been thoughtful enough to actually save him a piece of cake, he might as well eat it.

“Thank you. So”, Tony started, eating a piece of the cake, “how have you been handling the whole _let’s open Wakanda to the world_ thing?”

“It’s hard work, I won’t lie, but I believe all the sleepless nights will be worth it in the end. Oh, here, you have something in your mouth”.

And then, before Tony could even try to lick the frosting from the corner of his lips, T’Challa cleaned it with his thumb, licking it right after. Tony stood there, dumbfounded, staring at the king.

“Did you… Did you just take the frosting from my face with your thumb and licked it?”

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to offend you, Tony. Is this not customary in America?”

“Maybe in romantic comedies, between a couple. Not something friends do, no”.

“Oh, my mistake, then”, T’Challa said, unworried, “I did not know that, thank you for warning me, my friend”.

And with a nod, T’Challa left, leaving Tony behind with a lemon cake and the feeling that something was very _very_ wrong, indeed.

* * *

“He doesn’t like lemon cake”, Steve whispered.

“Did you say something?”

“He doesn’t like lemon cake”, he repeated, seeming angry now, and then immediately held his head on his hands, groaning.

“How do you know that?” Bruce asked, curious.

“I… I don’t know. Do you have water? I need water”, he whispered again.

Bruce gave Steve his own glass ― he never drank at these functions anyway ― and the soldier gulped the entire glass.

“Steve, are you okay?”

“Just a stupid headache, it’ll pass, don’t worry”.

* * *

Tony was sitting on the couch, alone, trying to figure out what was happening when Natasha sat right next to him.

_Steve was walking towards Tony. He didn’t even know why or what exactly he wanted. He didn’t even like Tony. No, he liked Tony. Tony was… Everything was confusing. His head hurt. He stopped walking when he saw Natasha sit next to the engineer._

“Enjoying the party?”

“What’s going on?”

“I don’t know what you mean”, Natasha replied with an innocent smile that Tony knew was full of shit.

“Thor never once in all the years we’ve known each other asked me to dance, but he did tonight. T’Challa, who’s always more than proper and knows every single thing there is to know about the etiquette of every single country in this planet, just took a bit of frosting from my lips with his finger and then licked the finger. But none of that was as weird as Maria Hill very loudly telling me that I looked delectable tonight”.

“Maybe she was drunk”.

“Cut the crap. What’s going on?”

Natasha huffed, biting her lip. “Tell you what, Anthony. You tell me something and I tell you something, how’s that?”

Tony simply nodded.

“Why can’t we tell Steve that you two were together? Doesn’t he deserve to know?” she asked softly, running her fingers through his hair slowly.

_Steve was standing in the middle of the room. Somewhere in his head, he knew he must look insane at that moment, just standing there, watching Natasha and Tony. He felt another stab at his chest when he saw the red head pet the engineer’s head, a tender, loving gesture. Steve hated it. He didn’t know why, but he hated it. He wanted to know why. God, why was everything so loud? His head hurt. It hurt. Hurt. Hurt._

Tony closed his eyes, feeling Natasha’s fingers through his hair. “No one ever wanted me for me, Nat. Every person I ever dated, and almost every person I ever met. Jack wanted my money. Tiberius wanted my company. Sunset wanted my secrets. Rumiko wanted my reputation. And then, there was Steve”, he whispered, tears in his eyes, “Steve knows me. He knows the real me, the me that hides behind a mask every day to face the world. He looked at me, with all my beauty and all my ugly, and loved me for who I am. I don’t want him to be with me because it has to. I want him to be with me because he wants to. And I know that might be selfish, but I can’t, Nat. I can’t”.

“Oh honey”, she said, pulling his head on her shoulder, “I understand. I’m so sorry”.

“STEVE!”

Natasha and Tony jumped at the scream, turning their heads to see what was going on. Steve was on the ground, clutching his head and crying out in pain.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> OMG, I promise, the next chapter will be the last one! I really have no self control, a two chapter turned into a three chapter turned into a four turned into a five chapters fic. H E L P
> 
> Also, if you liked it, leave a comment and follow me on tumblr! I'm thinking of doing a series of drabbles and I'd love to have some readers over there ;D  
> https://averagemarvelbitch.tumblr.com/


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Finally, the happy ending they deserve.

Steve opened his eyes slowly, blinking, trying to get them used to the light. He hadn’t had that bad a headache since before Project Rebirth and he very much hadn’t missed feeling like this. He felt nauseous, like he would throw up at any moment, and his head was a swirl of thoughts and memories and names and faces. It was all very confusing and he felt very _very_ tired.

“Stevie? Hey, can you hear me, pal?”

Steve turned his head slightly to the side and smiled when he saw his best friend.

“Hey. What happened?”

“You passed out at the party. We brought you to Medical so the doctors could check on you. How are you feeling?”

_The party_ , he remembered suddenly. The party where everyone was _smiling_ at his Tony and _touching_ his Tony and _dancing_ with his Tony. _His_ Tony. _OMG, TONY!_

“Stevie? Wow, pal, where are you going? STEVE!”

* * *

“So, let me get this straight… You all decided to go against the only thing I asked you to do and threw a party with the sole purpose of trying to make Steve, who doesn’t even remember me, jealous?”

“Yes”, Barton nodded, proud.

“And then you told Thor and T’Challa and Natasha and everybody else to, what, flirt with me in front of Steve?”

“Yes”.

“And now Steve is in a hospital bed after passing out in the middle of said party and we have no idea what happened to him?”

“Yes?”

“I’m gonna kill all of you, Barton”.

The Avengers were all sitting in the Waiting Room, waiting for news about Steve’s condition. Thor, Wanda and Vision had the decency to look sheepish while Tony lectured them on their irresponsibility while Natasha and Barton just looked at him, arms crossed and a petulant look on their faces.

“Look, your plan sucked, ok? So we came up with a better one!” Barton complained, “And I’m pretty sure Steve only passed out because he was getting his memories back!”

“Yeah? What if he passed out because he started remembering and the spell turned his brain into mashed potatoes because of it? Did you think of that?”

Clint opened his mouth, then closed it, looking at the others for help. When none came, he shrugged and looked down. “It was Bucky’s plan”.

“Oh, don’t worry, he’s gonna get it as soon as he leaves the room. How could you all be so irresponsible? Your little plan could’ve killed Steve! Or it could have made his memory loss even worse! Or even turned his brain…”

“Into mashed potatoes, yeah, we got it. We’re sorry, okay? We feel bad about it, but we had to do something!”

“We should all calm down”, Natasha finally said, “We don’t know what happened. For all we know, Steve is fine and just got all his memories of you back”.

Tony laughed, humorlessly. “Yeah, sure, ‘cause it’s always that easy”.

“All I’m saying is we shouldn’t jump to conclusions. Something bad might have happen, yes, it’s possible, but it’s also possible that something good came out of it”.

“Yeah, you’re going to need a lot more to convince me this was a good plan”, Tony replied, rolling his eyes.

“STEVE!”

They heard Bucky’s voice echo through the hallway and turned in time to see Steve running towards them, a desperate look on his face. Tony immediately uncrossed his arms and stepped forward, worried.

“Steve! What are you doing out of bed, are you o…” But the brunette never finished his question because the super soldier slammed into him, full force, and crashed their mouths together, holding Tony’s waist and pulling him closer.

Tony immediately closed his eyes, raising his hands to hold his lover’s face, kissing him back with everything he had. They ended the kiss too soon, noses still touching, their faces still close to one another as if they couldn’t bring themselves to be separated any longer. Tony opened his eyes and looked into Steve’s baby blues. The blonde smiled.

“Hi”.

Tony just stared at him, not really knowing what to say.

“So, are you convinced now or…?”

Everyone – except Tony and Steve, who were still gazing longingly into each other’s eyes – turned to glare at Barton, who looked affronted.

“What? I was just asking, jeez”.

* * *

 The doctors insisted on checking Steve once more before sending him home. They had a very hard time doing it, however, because the blonde refused to let go of Tony’s hand, all the while staring at him like he was seeing him for the very first time. When it was finally clear that there was nothing physically wrong with the super soldier, they were allowed to leave.

They took the elevator up and when FRIDAY asked where to, Steve promptly answered _penthouse, please_. They rode in silence, holding hands as the elevator went up. The blonde kept sneaking glances at Tony, frowning when he noticed how sad his partner looked. He didn’t say anything, though. Just exited the elevator, still holding Tony’s hand, and they both walked to their room in silence.

They were changing out of their clothes when Steve finally talked.

“I’m sorry”.

Tony, who was sitting down on their bed, wearing only his pajama pants, looked up at Steve.

“For what?”

“For Bonnie. Nothing happened, by the way. A kiss on the cheek when we met at the restaurant, but that was it. I promise”.

Tony nodded. “I believe you. You didn’t remember me, Steve, it’s fine”.

“No, it’s not”, he kneeled in front of his partner, taking his hands, “Tony, it’s not fine. And it’s perfectly okay if you’re mad at me”.

“I’m not”.

“Can I ask you something?”

Tony simply nodded.

“Why did you do that? Tell me I should go for it, that I should date her”.

“There was a very good chance you’d never remember. I just wanted you to be happy”, Tony explained, his eyes filling with tears, “Even if it wasn’t with me”.

“Tony”, Steve whispered, taking his partner’s face on his hands, “I could never be happy without you. Even when I didn’t remember you, I could feel something was missing. And even when you told me to go for it with Bonnie, every single second I spent with her I kept thinking something was wrong, that I was doing something wrong. It felt like I was cheating and I had no idea why”.

“Really?”

“Yeah. You can ask Bucky, I told him all about it”, he kissed Tony’s nose, smiling softly, “I love you”.

“Do you?”

Steve frowned. “Of course I… Oh. The kitchen incident?”

Tony simply nodded with a sad smile.

“You said I was annoying and clingy. That you wished you saw less of me. I can’t help but wonder if you always felt that way and just… pretended for my sake”.

“I love how you talk during movies. How you explain the things I don’t understand or how you complain about the how wrong their science is. I love that you always sit so close to me whenever we are and I love that you always hold my hand when we walk or when we’re close to each other. I don’t know why I thought that before, with the spell…”

“If I may interrupt, sirs… The others have an interesting theory about that. They think perhaps the spell did more than just erase the Captain’s memories, but also blocked something in his mind, making him incapable of falling in love with you again, boss”.

Tony nodded. “That actually sounds like something Loki would do”.

“Tony, please, listen to me. I love you. I have never loved anyone like I love you. I love everything about you. And I’m so sorry that I made you feel insecure and sad, and I’ll never forgive myself for it…”

“No, Steve, it wasn’t your fault”, Tony tried to protest, but Steve shook his head.

“Doesn’t matter, I still hurt you. And I’m sorry. And I’ll spend the rest of my life making sure that you never doubt my love for you again. Please. Please, forgive me”.

“I forgive you”, Tony replies, smiling, “There’s nothing to forgive, but if it’s so important to you to hear it, then I forgive you”.

“Where’s your ring?”

“Barnes. I gave it to him, with the dog tags”.

“It’s okay. We’ll get them back later. For now, I just want to love every inch of you. Is that okay?”

Tony smiled. “More than okay, soldier”, he said, kissing his future husband.

And at that moment, feeling Steve’s mouth on his, feeling his soft touches on his body, Tony couldn’t help but think of all the things they had faced so far, and all the things they would most likely face in the future. And for the first time in a very long time he wasn’t afraid. Because they would face everything together, just like Steve had always said.

_Through it all, together._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, the reason I didn't finish this sooner is because I watched Endgame Wednesday and I've been crying ever since, so I needed a few days to... Cry less, I guess, 'cause I'm still crying lol
> 
> Hope you like this ending! There's another fic I'm working on, check it out! It's supposed to be super fluff and funny and perfect for everyone who has watched the movie and needs a break!
> 
> Leave kudos and a comment to show your support! And follow me on tumblr!  
> https://averagemarvelbitch.tumblr.com/


End file.
